what's up doc?

i got some not-so-good news this week (don't worry; it's not about me). my doctor, who is also pregnant, is having complications with her pregnancy and will be out for the remainder of her pregnancy. of course my first thought was, how does this affect me??? well, she won't be back until sometime in february, since she will also be taking maternity leave. this means that the doctor that i love and trust is basically out of commission and won't be able to give me prenatal care or deliver my baby. i can use the other two doctors in her practice or i can wait until open season and try to get another insurance plan. of course the other two docs are absolutely impossible to get an appointment with. i tried a month ahead for both of them and wasn't able to be seen by either on the day i wanted. so, i am trying to get recommendations from people here (which is difficult, since i haven't been here long and don't really know all that many people with babies) and will probably have to change my plan next month. it is a cause of some stress for me, but i am trying to just take it all in stride so that i am not making myself crazy.

i do love the nurse that has been assigned to me, though. she is great. for now i am making my appointments with her for the routine things until i figure out the doctor stuff. i went to see her yesterday and we heard the heartbeat again (yay). every time i hear it i am nervous because i still feel like it just won't be there. even though i am starting to show and really feel like i am pregnant, i always have this feeling like i am going to wake up one day and not be pregnant anymore. it is bizarre. i guess once i start feeling the kicking i will constantly be reminded of that little alien in my belly. but all is well with the baby. it is about 5 inches long right now and i will know in a month what the sex is! my appointment is october 2, so mark your calendars! we did a bunch of blood tests yesterday, the results of which i will know next week. i am pretty anxious about the whole genetic testing/possible defect thing. i know that the chances are slim, but i can't help but feel super nervous that something might be wrong. i just wish i had a little window in my belly that i could open up to check in on the little bean every once in a while to make sure everything is ok. god, i am going to be a nervous wreck when this baby is actually born and exposed to the world!

we are off to chicago with our good friends steve and michelle today. i have never visited the windy city, and i am really excited. they have planned everything for us: food, art exhibits, baseball games, tours, shopping, everything. it should be a great time. i am happy to spend some quality time with them, since it seems like we have been missing each other the last few weeks. i know they are nervous about what things will be like once the bean has arrived, and also where we will end up. i think a weekend away is just what we need.